NAIJAUNCUT WILL NOT ASK YOU TO PAY FOR ANYTHING SO DONT BE SCAMMED FOR ANYTHING!
So just work up the courage to do it and do it. Godspeed!
1. She starts liking something random you like after you mentioned you liked it. Oh, what’s that? She likes Neko Case all of the sudden? Wowza, what a huge coincidence. She knows all about the Manchester United game even though two days ago she knew shit about soccer? Holy smokes. She knows all about the new Kid Cudi album that just dropped after you were just saying how excited you were about it? Yeah, these aren’t coincidences, so don’t overlook them. Don’t make her feel dumb by saying, “Oh please you said you hate soccer!”
Follow her lead. Let her brag about her new knowledge. Teach her something new. Plan a date around it. Because you’re definitely going to want to ask her out.
2. She touches your arm a lot. Sorry, it’s all we’ve got, guys. We want to touch you but many places seem off limits. Touching your face would make us feel like we are in a Hallmark commercial, touching your chest would make us feel like we were in a Lifetime movie, and touching your junk would make us feel like we were in a porno. Basically, that leaves the arm. So we touch it a lot if we are interested. If you can think of something better let us know.
3. She laughs at everything you say. Yeah, even when you aren’t really saying anything that funny. Sorry. It’s something we can’t help and we probably aren’t proud of. It’s not that we are faking it, we are just really giddy to be around you if we have a crush on you. So everything seems a little lighter, a little more fun, and a little more likely to make us bust our gut or snort or… I’m just not going to say it.
4. She keeps asking you to do the most odd, unrelationships things. If she keeps asking you to do non-date things, like going to weird comedy shows that are sort of far away or going to her brother’s baseball game or feeding the neighbor’s cat, she is doing the dance of doing absolutely everything except for asking you out on a real date. So why don’t you do everyone a favor and ask her out? You both will have a better time doing something other than working her hectic charity event or helping her move.
5. She sends you mail. Real mail. She had to get paper and a writing device — which are increasingly becoming hard to come by. She had to write with her handwriting, which she hardly does anymore. She put way more thought into her words since she wasn’t just shooting them out on her keyboard. And she licked and sealed the envelope. That is love. Or at least mega-like. Ask her out, for goodness sake.
6. She always wants to be in pictures with you. Are there a disproportionate amount of pictures of you with her than with other people? Especially guys? She wants be be part of your life. She wants to show you off. She wants you to remember her. She is inserting herself into your life in the only way she can without asking you out.
She has agreed to do anything you have suggested so far. If you’re asking her to do anything with a group of friends or anything non-datey, and you hardly have to finish the question “Do you want to go rock climb…” or “Do you want to grab a bee…” before she says yes, she’d rather be doing these things as your girlfriend.
Especially if she says it like it’s not even a question. Of course she will! With gusto, she’ll be there with bells on! She’s psyched about anything because you will be there.
8. She hasn’t mentioned any other guys in your presence. That’s because she’s not thinking of any other guys. And she won’t even bring up friend boys, because she doesn’t want you to assume they are boyfriends.
9. She brings you something when you’re sick or similarly cooks you anything ever. Yeah, she’s showing you her nurturing side. It’s not because she’s filling some gender role, she’s just seizing the opportunity to be sweet. It’s an easy in to make you a casserole or drop by with some ginger ale.
10. You have met her friends and they seem surprisingly psyched to meet you. They are already excited to see you and already know what you do because they have heard about you. In fact, they might be sick of you. They might be thinking, “Will you just ask her out already?” So go ahead and do it.
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