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That girlfriend who can’t seem to stand on her own feet, always needing her man to be around her so she can function like a normal person would. More importantly, that girlfriend who causes her man the kind of suffocation no sane man would be able to withstand, even if he loves her dearly.

While it’s totally sweet to want to be with your boyfriend every waking hour of your life, it’s just not how matured people in relationships act (and that’s a fact!) Being clingy does more harm than good in a relationship and you know that if you’ve been with a clingy and possessive boyfriend in the past.

So if you’re despairing because you know “clingy” is how you’ve always been as a girlfriend, don’t! There are ways to become less clingy in your relationship and we’ve rounded them up in an effort to help you keep your man. Read on.

1) How to be less clingy? Admit it first

You can’t start working on anything until you actually admit first that there’s something’s wrong (which, in this case, is your insufferable level of clinginess).

So find the courage to admit you need help in transforming from super clingy to a less clingy girlfriend. After you’ve done so, you’ll be ready to take the next steps to permanently saying goodbye to your “Ms. Clingy” title.

2) Talk about it to trusted confidantes

Hell, yeah! Gather the girlfriends you trust with your apartment keys (and your life, for that matter) and let them know how much of a mess you feel. Don’t be afraid to admit your fears and speak about how clingy you’ve been to your SO.

Don’t hold back on the truth because if they don’t know the intensity of the problem, they won’t realize how much in need you are. They’d surely lend you all the hands (and emotional support) in order to help you learn how to be less clingy to your boyfriend.

3) Get your daily dose of R&R

Take some time off from your relationship, if needed, so you can spend that much needed time for treating yourself better. Do it every single day. Replace that time he used to fill in for you with some me time. Spend it doing whatever feels right.

Sometimes, that’s just what you need so you can feel secure of who you are and what you’re capable of on your own. So sit back, relax, and enjoy babe. You will be a less clingy girlfriend in no time!

4) Work on your self-esteem

Chances are you’re a clingy girlfriend because you have issues in the self-esteem department. If so, work on your self-confidence level. Do things that make you feel good about yourself. Pursue your passion and interests outside of the relationship.

This would not only make you feel good about yourself; it would also help him see that you are one badass lady who’s capable of running the world and taking care of her man at the same time (without being clingy).

5) Shift your focus

Instead of staring at your laptop or smartphone waiting for his message, move around. Don’t wait for his text or call at all and go on with your day without being anxious about his whereabouts. Yes, we all know that not knowing what he’s doing and where he’s at sucks, but, listen!

He doesn’t want you following him around like some dog. If you make yourself too available to him, chances are he’ll lose interest and that’s the last thing you wanted now that you’re trying to be a better person and a better girlfriend to him, right?

6) Give him the space he needs

Yes, you probably noticed this but may have forgotten when your need to be clingy kicks in. But hey, in case you’ve forgotten, your man is not a baby! He’s a grownup. Let him do his thing. Give him the time he needs to himself and the time he needs to spend with his buddies.

Trust that he knows how to take care of himself (because he should). He’d surely appreciate you (and miss you in the process) if you give him space he rightfully deserves. Giving him his space daily will surely help you become a less clingy girlfriend although for sure, it won’t be easy for you in the beginning especially when you’re used to monitoring his daily activities but trust us when we say it’s worth giving a shot.

7) Diversify your social scene

You don’t have to lock yourself up in bed while you give him the time he rightfully deserves as a loving bae to you. You can actually go out and see people you love like your parents, relatives, colleagues, and close friends.

You can also start meeting new people by joining book clubs (or just about any kind of club that’s aligned to your fields of interests) and small groups outside of your workplace where your creative juices can start flowing again.

This will help you feel like your life can actually revolve around other things and people aside from him, making you a less clingy girlfriend in the long run.

8) Kiss the “what if’s” goodbye

Stop over thinking, dear. “What if he’s talking to his ex-girlfriend when you’re not together? What if he’s not really working but is on a date with someone else?” Kick these unnecessary “what if’s” to the curb because they’re not helping you and the situation.

They’re only making things worse. Take control of your mind and don’t give in to your fears. Whenever your thoughts start to spin out of control again, focus on the good things about your relationship. Remember that you’ve been together through thick and thin and you’ll make it through this storm, too.

9) Give up control

Control is one thing you surely wanted to have in your relationship with him and by now you know that too much of it is not a good thing, right? Yes. The desire to have so much control over him and the relationship is one of the reasons you’ve become so clingy of him.

This toxic behavior can ruin the beautiful love story you have written together and so to achieve your own version of happy ever after, give up control the soonest time you can. Breathe in. Breathe out. Let go. Trust the process. It’s hard but it’s worth it if you love him that much.

Bonus tip: How to avoid being THAT clingy girlfriend

If you suspect you’re clingy or you’re headed down the “Clingy Road”, know that it’s not too late for you yet. You can still choose the right path, that which will lead you to be a less clingy girlfriend.

Just heed the words of wisdom we’ve dropped here, summon all the patience and courage you need, and you’ll be on your way to becoming the less clingy girlfriend he’ll grow to care for and love more.

It’s a road that can be quite rocky; no wonder most people find it hard to navigate so they just avoid it altogether.

On the flip side, traversing this rocky road can also be worth it once you find the gem at the end of the challenging trail: your true love.

So if you think your feelings for your guy BFF has leveled up, he feels the same way and you both want to give it a shot, here are crucial pros and cons to seriously consider before you give him your short and sweet “Yes!”.

Read on to find out if dating your best friend is the right thing to do.

The Pros

You can skip the awkward getting-to-know-you phase

You already know each other’s favorite food, hobbies, major pet peeves, and the list goes on. In short, you know each other very well as you’ve spent the past years being best friends.

Having said so, once you start dating your best friend officially, you can then focus on more in-depth conversations. This can include long-term personal goals and goals you may want to accomplish as a couple.

Creating these kinds of conversations deepens the level of connection that you have with each other and makes your already solid relationship stronger than ever. Isn’t that just wonderful?

While dating your best friend, you can be yourself

Because he already knows that you’re a big fan of pizza, you don’t have to pretend that you look forward to eating in a fancy restaurant with him. You’d rather stay indoors and eat with him like there’s no tomorrow.

And because you’ve probably been best friends since third grade, chances are he knows your most embarrassing moments and he’s surely seen you at your worst.

Thus, you can just be your awkward and beautiful self without having to fear about getting judged for how you behave because he already knows and loves you all the same.

This is yet another nice perk of dating your best friend. How cool is that, right?

He’s already friends with your friends

And vice versa. For this reason, there’s no need for group dates where either you or he gets to sit on the hot seat and gets to be asked crazy questions.

You don’t have to put on a facade just to gain their approval (and it’s the same for him, too) since they already know you and respects you for who you are.

In short, you don’t have to start at square one. This makes your relationship with each other a lot easier and smoother to navigate, another reason that you may want to say “Yes” to the idea of dating your best friend.

Lover’s quarrels can be a lot easier to deal with

Since you both know what tickles each other’s fancy and what causes each other to be turned off, you can easily avoid having petty fights.

But as we all know, fights, both the petty and the major ones, cannot be avoided while you’re in a loving relationship. Yes! This even includes when you’re dating your best friend.

But since you’re already armed with this precious knowledge, you can resolve conflicts with fewer struggles as opposed to those couples who don’t have a clue about how each other truly feels about the dilemma at hand.

The Cons

He may know more than you wanted him to

TMI can sometimes have more disadvantages than advantages. Since he knows you very well, chances are he knows how many boyfriends you’ve had had in the past (and who were the ones you’ve slept with).

He knows your very weaknesses and deepest secrets and sometimes, there will be a part of you that wishes he doesn’t because that makes life too easy and too predictable for him.

Getting time apart can be a challenge

There will be days when you’ll need to some time away from him, a time when you crave for a kind of warmth you only get when you spend time with your friends.

However, since you have common friends, chances are he’ll be with the friends you’d actually want to spend some time with.

If so, it’s not like you can just ask him to leave so you can get that much needed time to chat with your other friends, right?

That would look totally immature and uncool. So you may end up just spending time alone with yourself and that can be really sad when you know you badly needed company. This is one downside of dating you best friend that you may want to put a lot of thought into.

Surprises can be a little harder to plan

You’d struggle pulling off surprises for him, whether big or small because he knows and can feel it when you’re trying to hide something from him.

He knows you very well he can predict your reactions and can decipher your thoughts just by staring at you or watching your moves closely.

Having said so, surprising him on important occasions such as birthdays and anniversaries can get a little tricky and this can be a downside of dating your best friend if you love creating surprises for the people you hold dear to your heart.

Even so, if you truly want to pull one off for him, you have to get your creative juices flowing. Try to enlist the help of your squad and his, too. We’re positive they’d be up for the challenge!

You risk ruining a beautiful friendship

Breakups are inevitable, even if you’re already dating your best friend. So if ever you two didn’t work out as a couple, know that the solid and beautiful friendship you once had will be put to the test.

Depending on what caused your fallout, you may end up deciding you’re better off as friends or you may become total strangers in the end. If it’s the former, good for you.

But if it’s the latter, know that things happen for a reason and you just have to deal with it the best way you can.

If you end up losing him both as a best friend and a boyfriend, then you still got other friends, your girl squad, and of course, your family who will embrace you for who you are, okay?

Anyway, this is just if you end up breaking up but if not, your love story is one proof that you can actually date your best friend, fall in love together, and live happily ever after.

Dating your best friend: It’s worth the risk

The most beautiful and unforgettable love stories are those with best friends falling in love with each other every single day, though thick and thin.

So if you believe in your heart that this can be you and your guy BFF, go for it. Let no one stop you from achieving the most heartwarming tale you won’t get tired of sharing with the little children and even adults who have totally given up on true love.

Just be mindful of the consequences and be careful of the decisions you’ll make as once you start an intimate relationship with a guy you only had a platonic relationship with in the past, it can be quite new and different, but all the more exciting.

1) Eye contact in the hallway

There’s no better way to get yourself noticed than through a bit of eye contact, and luckily there’s no easier way to flirt than through your eyes. Even if you’re feeling a bit shy or too nervous to go over and make the first move, maintaining eye contact in the corridors or giving him a lingering look in a lesson shows that you’re interested and open to being approached. Even a subtle glance in his direction as you pass each other in the corridors will be enough to catch his attention and make him notice you.

2) How to flirt at school? Smile!

Now making eye contact is all well and good but only if you’re approachable, and nothing says approachable more than a smile. Guys love confidence and nothing says confidence quite like a big megawatt glimpse of your pearly whites.

Even if you’re a bit self-conscious of your smile, maybe you have braces and don’t feel super confident about showing your teeth off – just remember that when you’re smiling you’re at your happiest, and in the famous words of Audrey Hepburn, the happiest girls are always the prettiest!

3) Be confident

When flirting with a guy, it’s crucial you’re confident in your appearance before going over and talking to him. If you are quick to avoid eye contact, stutter when he speaks to you or go bright red then he might soon start to feel uncomfortable and things could get awkward.

Approach him with firm eye contact, maintain it during the conversation and be confident with what you’re saying, no matter what it is. Someone who is confident and friendly is going to flirt much better than someone who is nervous and unsure what to do.

4) Close the gap between you

If he’s in the same classes as you, make an effort to try and sit near him and make conversation. It can be about anything; introduce yourself, make small talk about the lesson you’re in and from there you can move on to discuss yourself in more detail and find out more about him at the same time. Then the next time you see him, you can approach him confidently, and you already know what kind of things you both enjoy talking about.

5) Connect online

Once he knows who you are and you’ve had a few conversations, why not send him a friend request on Facebook? This way you can build up a friendship and possibly start chatting to him online after school and on the weekends, taking things to the next level in a subtle way without being over the top. It’s one of the easiest ways to continue the flirting outside of the school gates!

6) Be approachable

If you’re always with a massive group of your friends in the corridors, it can be quite intimidating for him to come over and talk to you. But by sometimes standing or sitting alone, he will be more likely to come over and start up the conversation, which can then lead to a bit of fun flirting!

Now I’m not suggesting you stand alone in the corridors and avoid hanging out with your friends just in case he sees you and speaks to you, but when you are with your friends, it doesn’t hurt to smile or maintain eye contact if you see him to show you’re keen for a conversation just as much as he is.

7) Make jokes

Arguably the best way to see how well you get on with someone is to see if you share their sense of humor. Sometimes it can be make or break for any potential relationship with your crush.

Humour is everything, and it’s also one of the most attractive traits when it comes to finding someone. So when you’re with him make sure you joke around and show him your playful side. This shows that you’re carefree and fun, someone who doesn’t take themselves too seriously and is game for a laugh.

But don’t fall into the trap of just laughing at anything he says in the hope of making him feel good because eventually he will be able to tell and then things could get awkward. So keep the laughter genuine and you have one of the best ways to flirt at school because you are creating special moments between just the two of you.

8) Compliment him

When you are flirting with him, it’s always a good idea to compliment him. What is it you like most about him? Well, tell him! Giving someone a compliment is a good way to show them that you care and are interested in them, making it another great option for flirting at school.

But remember to always be sincere; making up something you don’t think is true just for the sake of it will only end badly. Instead really compliment him on things you actually like about him, which means you’re going to sound more natural and confident.

9) Create a common bond

If you both have the same interests, make sure to join in with some after school clubs or activities together. Sometimes actions speak louder than words, so there’s nothing better than doing something together that you both enjoy. It shows there’s more to your relationship than just superficial flirting; it means you have shared interests and something else connecting you and bringing you together.

10) Catch up outside of school

Why not suggest doing something outside of school? You can ask to meet him just the two of you or if you don’t want the pressure of being alone, suggest something with a group of mutual friends – you can get to know him better without the pressure of one on one alone time.

Sure, there are certain elements of finding love that are up to fate and chance, like exactly when you meet a guy that feels like your perfect fit. But there are also some things that you can control. One of those things is your attitude. It’s definitely best to look for love with a positive outlook. Easier said than done, yes, but it’s still necessary.

Read on to find out some positive affirmations for finding love that actually work.

1) I deserve love

So you’ve been single for a while now and have gone on your fair share of first dates. Do you ever tell yourself that you deserve love? Probably not.

It may sound pretty corny but that’s exactly what this is one of the positive affirmations to find love that actually works. If you don’t think that you deserve to be in a healthy and happy relationship and if you don’t think that anyone should love you, then how can they? You won’t be able to start dating a great new guy if you don’t love yourself first. It’s like a law of dating.

Get used to telling yourself this every morning and it might just lead you to the best guy that you’ve ever known.

2) My mistakes don’t define me

Everyone makes mistakes in relationships. You get too obsessed with your college boyfriend and don’t have a life outside of him. You text the guy you’re hooking up with when you’re in 20s 24/7 and then wonder why he acts like you’re too much. You fall for the wrong people and stay with boyfriends much longer than you really should. And you definitely allow yourself to be treated badly when you should really walk away.

That’s okay, though. Because you aren’t your mistakes. Repeat this. Get to know it. Of all the positive affirmations to can help you find love, this is one that is very liberating. It can help you move forward with the sweet guy that you just met that you can’t get out of your head.

If you’re too scared about making the same mistakes again in every new relationship that you find yourself in, then things will never work out well for you. So you definitely want to tell yourself that you are not your mistakes and you can definitely move on.

3) I am brave and willing to take the risk

It’s hard to be brave when you finally like a new guy after being single for a long time. You’re used to the way that your life is set up. You’re used to not getting hurt. You’re used to everything being exactly the same all the time.

When you want to be in a relationship, you have to take a risk and be vulnerable. There’s no getting around that. From the first time that you tell a new guy that you like him and want to keep dating him, to the first time you hold hands to the first kiss to the first sleepover, there are a ton of early milestones that require a lot of courage and risk.

So one of the positive affirmations to find love that you can tell yourself? That would be that you can be brave and you can take the risk. Sometimes you just have to be your own cheerleader and this is one of those times.

4) I will never stop trying to find love

Do you believe that trying is the only way to succeed when it comes to finding love? You might. You might not. It might depend on the day… or how many bad dates you’ve gone on this month.

The truth is that being single and searching for love means going on first dates. A lot of them. This adds up to a lot of awful evenings that make you wonder what the point is.

Tell yourself that you will find love if you keep trying. Because you really will. The only way to guarantee your single status for the rest of your life is if you give up trying and leave it at that. Why would you do that to yourself? This is one of the positive affirmations to find love that really work.

You don’t have to go crazy – you still have your own life to live and you don’t want to get desperate. But just make sure that you’re still putting in the effort and staying open-minded.

5) I know what I want

Do you think that you know what you want when it comes to finding a partner? Sometimes you think that you do because you have a checklist of the qualities that you think your future boyfriend has to have. Then, of course, when you do fall in love for real, this person is the opposite of who you saw yourself with. Which is totally fine since now you’re happy and in love and everything is going well.

When you’ve had a lot of bad luck with your dating life, you probably want to tell yourself that you know what you want. This is going to give you lots of high self-esteem and just the right amount of motivation to keep up the search for love. If you want a healthy relationship, then these positive affirmations to find love will be a big help.

6) I have everything I need

Tell yourself this on a regular basis and you just might meet the right guy. That’s because this is one of the positive affirmations to find love that really gets you in the right frame of mind to finally add a partner to your already amazing life.

You don’t have to lose five to ten pounds to find love. You don’t need to move to a fancy new condo. You don’t have to change careers or change your entire personality… or even get a new hairstyle. If you want to find love, guess what? You have everything that you need. You really do. If someone doesn’t love you for who you are right now in this moment, then they’re not the right person for you and it’s time to find someone who will.

While this can be tough to remember, especially if you’re dealing with the inevitable rejection that comes along with dating,

Are you tired of feeling like your love life is going nowhere? Do you want to finally find a partner to share your already fun and full life with? You just might need to change your attitude. Part of that is becoming your own best friend, cheerleader and support system. In other words, you need to tell yourself some positive affirmations on a regular basis.

So if you’re looking for some positive affirmations to find love, then you’ve come to the right place because these 6 ones will do the trick.

When you think about it, it’s a big part of any relationship since this is going to be a major way that you two communicate.

So what do you do when he doesn’t like texting or even using his phone?

It’s not impossible to handle this. You really can find a way to make this work. We promise. Read on to find out how to deal when he is bad at texting.

1) Calm down

When you first text this guy, you probably notice pretty quickly that he’s not super into texting. That’s because he’s going to take a billion hours to respond to you.

Okay, okay, so maybe it’s only a few hours. But it definitely feels like days upon days. You’re pretty used to getting answers back ASAP since the other guys that you’ve dated have been really good texters and, of course, you text your BFFs on a regular basis.

The first thing to do when you want to know how to deal when he is bad at texting is to calm down, chill out, and take a series of deep breaths. The truth is that this isn’t going to be as big a deal in the long run as it feels like right now.

It’s not like you have to dump this guy just because he doesn’t love to use his phone. That would be totally crazy, right? Would you want him to do the same thing if the roles would be reversed? Yeah, exactly.

As soon as you start realizing that it doesn’t matter, you’re going to feel a whole lot better.

2) Stop overthinking it

You need to know this right now: just because he doesn’t love texting doesn’t mean he doesn’t love you. Or doesn’t really, really like you if you haven’t gotten to that L-word stage yet. He totally does. After all, you’re awesome.

It just means that texting (and maybe even phones in general or even some technology) just isn’t his thing. That’s okay. He’s entitled to his own opinion.

He’s allowed to hate texting. There must be something that you hate, right? Maybe you’re not a big tweeter or you’ve gotten tired of posting your every thought and selfie on your Facebook page.

You would totally hate it if he wanted to Facebook message you all the time and you didn’t want to use that social media platform. It’s totally the same thing.

Put yourself in the position of one of your best friends. If they were in a similar situation, would you tell them that this guy definitely hated them since he wasn’t texting them 24/7 or answering them within two seconds?

No, definitely not. You would say that it doesn’t mean anything at all. So this is a time when you need to take your own (really good and really smart) advice.

3) Focus on in-person communication

Think of this as a great opportunity to actually talk to this guy. You know, face-to-face like a couple of normal human beings. It’s amazing how you can get used to texting instead of talking, and the truth is that when it comes to matters of the heart, that’s really not a good idea.

It’s actually the worst idea in the world. Do you want an actual boyfriend or do you want to have an entire relationship over text messages?

Focus on in-person communication and you won’t even wonder how to deal when he is bad at texting. If you focus on spending quality time together – as in a few times a week and more than an hour each time – then you will be creating and building something so much more important than a series of text messages.

You will be on your way to a really solid and beautiful relationship, and that’s honestly the entire point of this whole thing. Love makes the world go round, right? Seriously, you will forget that you were ever upset about this sooner than you know.

4) Consider it a good thing

Go back down your romantic memory lane for a minute (yes, even if it sucks to think about the past). How many times did you spend way too long trying to decipher a guy’s text message?

How often did you text your best friends, asking them what he really meant? How many hours did you waste overthinking absolutely everything that had to do with your texting conversations? Yeah, you definitely freaked out about this, even if you didn’t even mean to.

It’s also pretty awesome that this guy doesn’t text you so often that you wonder if he’s a.) a crazy clingy person or b.) has no life at all. It’s not great when someone loves using their phone so much that they just never seem to put it away.

Would you rather date a guy who never pays attention to you because all he does is sit there with his nose in his phone? That would definitely suck. It’s much better when the opposite is happening.

So even if you’re wondering how to deal when he is bad at texting, you can probably see by now that this is actually a good thing.

5) Text only to make plans

At the end of the day, texting is a really useful way to communicate with someone. But that doesn’t mean that you should use it to pour your heart out to him about how he’s totally your soulmate. And it’s definitely not a good idea to ask him via text message if he’s mad at you or to try to work out your problems in this venue.

If you can text your guy when you’re making plans and that’s it, then you’re going to both be much happier both now and later on. You won’t have to pressure him into chatting about your days over text message when he would rather just meet for dinner and have an actual, in-person conversation.

You won’t make him feel bad that he doesn’t want to live his life according to his phone. And most importantly, you will prove to him that you care about him and that you respect his opinions and his beliefs. That’s truly the key to a great relationship – not how often you text emojis and gifs about your work day.

Any relationship has its ups and downs and its problems. But for every problem, there is definitely a solution just waiting for you. If you are wondering how to deal when he is bad at texting, this should help you figure out that it’s really not a bad thing.

It could even bring you two closer and could help you build the best relationship ever. And when you’re crazy in love and your entire life has changed, you won’t even care about a little text message.

But, it doesn’t have to be that way. There is no set definition of what love is and how you are supposed to express it. In fact, every person’s love is different because every relationship is unique due to people being their own selves.

That is the beauty of love when you find it, it is so special, rare, amazing, and essentially indescribable because you make it your own and it is only shared between the two of you.

So why not make this Valentines day your own, by making it suit you and your partner, along with the love the two of you share? Make this Valentines special and perfect by using some of YouQueens original date ideas for Valentine’s day!

Go dancing

This original date idea for Valentine’s day isn’t any random club. Instead, this date idea involves the two of you going to a salsa club where you can dance the night away and have lots of fun. This is a perfect idea, even if you don’t know what you’re doing because you can just watch others and you’ll quickly pick up the groove.

Even if you don’t, you can just do some normal dancing, because you and your partner will be so busy just having fun, making memories, and loving every minute in such an amazing atmosphere.

Boat cruise

Surprise you Valentine with a night out at sea by going to a dinner and dance cruise. There are plenty of these for various occasions and they are all amazing.

You’ll both enjoy a romantic meal together, and will then be able to dance the night away as you float along. Not only is this fun, but there is also a beautiful view of the city skyline or nothing but water and sky surrounding you.

If you want to escape the people and also the noise, then head out to the outdoor area of the boat. There, you can just hold each other in each other’s arms while you talk, kiss, share your love for each other, and enjoy each others company.

Not only will you both be feeling extra romantic, but you will also get to look at each other and the beautiful waters for your day of love.

Weekend getaway

Spend your Valentines day by getting away from the world for the weekend so you can just spend time focusing on each other. Rent a log cabin somewhere in a beautiful forest, enjoy nature, and each other. Or, hop on a plane and go somewhere tropical.

No matter where you go for your getaway weekend, incorporate Valentine’s day and keep it romantic by tossing away your phones in some drawer. This way you can just immerse yourselves in each other on this very romantic weekend getaway.

Clubbing

If this original date idea for Valentine’s day screams fun, excitement, and love for you and your partner, then go to your favorite club/rave where your favorite DJ is playing. Spend your Valentines day grinding and partying the night away together!

Couples retreat

Do a couples retreat from your own home. Buy face masks, body oils, and some nice bath salts.

Spoil each other as you both relax and unwind together. If you chose this date idea for Valentine’s day, you will even get to massage your partner and take baths with them.

James Bond style

This is a fantastic and original date idea for Valentine’s day because it is romantic, sexy, adventurous, and mysterious.

For this, to work, you have to leave a note and formal outfit at the doorstep of your partner. On the note, you would write something sweet and romantic, and also something that says what time your picking them up and to wear what’s in the box.

Then take them to a surprise event such as a play, musical, dinner at a very special venue, a classical concert, or a gala.

Sunset at the beach

Go to the beach, and watch the sunset as you sit on the sand drinking and eating a delicious dinner (take out works for this as well). This is a very romantic way to spend Valentine’s day as you will just be able to sit, talk, look at a beautiful view together, and also look at each other.

As much as this may sound lame, or like an overrated and over done scene from romantic movies. It is still an amazing date because it is simple, allows you to focus on each other, and it is also beautifully romantic.

Stay at home

Yes, that’s right just stay home and hang out together. As much as this may sound lack luster. It is actually very sweet and romantic because when you love a person all that matters is that you are hanging out together.

This date idea for Valentine’s day is one that can be just as magical, or even more magical than the others. It will be as amazing as you make it.

So cook or order in an amazingly delicious meal, sit by the fire place, drink some wine, eat and talk. When your done eating, curl up and cuddle together as you watch movies, talk, and just enjoy each others company.

Go skating

Source via www.tumblr.com

Go to an ice rink, hold hands, and just talk and make memories as you both glide on the ice. This is a very romantic date, even if one of you don’t know how to do this. If that is the case, your partner will teach you, hold on to you, and will catch you if you fall.

Paint

You can do this original date idea at home, or at a painting store. Either way, it is very sweet and romantic to sit down in front of a canvas and to just talk as you both paint paintings for each other.

Go bowling

Source via weheartit.com

Go on an old school date and go to a bowling alley. This may sound grimy, un attractive, or even juvenile. However, it isn’t. Instead, it is tons of fun and the both of you will not only laugh, but the two of you will also bond over becoming competitive and waiting to see who wins.

Hike

Spend Valentine’s day surrounded by the beauty nature has to offer. As you enjoy the crisp, fresh air, you will also just enjoy the view and conversation. There’s something magical about hikes, it has a way of bonding people together and making a connection that is already prominently strong, even stronger.

That’s just not the truth. The main reason that I’m undateable is because I am not focusing my entire life around going on dates. Here are some other reasons why I’m an “undateable” girl.

1. I’d rather stay in than go out

I’m not one of those girls whose main focus is going out every night. Of course, this is where most girls meet the guys they start to date, or even hook up with when they’re out and partying. I don’t find the fun in that.

On the off chance that I do go out, I’m not going to remember what went on anyway. I go out to have fun with my friends, and it usually ends up with me blacking out anyway. If I do meet a guy, chances are that I will not know who he is the next day. Sorry, not sorry.

2. I like having the bed to myself

I don’t like to share my bed. My bed is my safe space and my happy place. No one gets to be in my happy space beside me. Sharing a bed does not sound appealing to me whatsoever.

It’s not going to happen. I’m not going to sleep next to someone who refuses to let me stop spooning and overheat at night.

3. I can’t even choose what I want for dinner

If I don’t even know what I want to eat, how am I going to know who I want to date? It takes me forever to pick anything on the menu.

Like, a ridiculous amount of time. It’s embarrassing. It’s not that much different when it comes to guys. I don’t like to make choices, so I don’t want to feel like I have to choose someone to be with.

4. I don’t have time for drama

photo via pexels

I don’t care what anyone says, there is no relationship on this planet that doesn’t include a bunch of fights. Whether they be big fights or small ones, it adds unnecessary drama to my life, and I don’t feel like dealing with that.

When you start dating someone, then you need to start thinking about that person when it comes to certain decisions you make, and if things don’t match up, something is bound to happen.

5. I love my alone time

Dating someone means sharing time together. Yeah, it can be great when you’re with someone that genuinely adds something to your life, but most guys these days don’t meet that standard for me.

I’m the kind of person who needs to spend time alone to be able to go out with people and be social.

6. I work often

I work my way through life. I am focused on progressing with my career. I work often because I need to make my own money to pay for bills.

Most guys I’ve dated have not understood that my work is very important to me. I am not a workaholic, but I’m not messing around with my money just to hang out with you.

7. I’d rather spend time with my friends

photo via pexels

I put my friends on a pedestal no matter what. They are my priority because they have been there for me long before guys have been in my life, and they have been there after those guys have left my life. I can count on them for anything, so I am not going to blow them off for a guy.

I feel the most comfortable when I’m with my friends. We always have fun when we’re together because of how close we are and there is never any drama. It’s just easier to have fun with the girls than to focus on a guy.

8. I don’t choose the right guys

I have to take responsibility for this article. There are great guys in the world. I can never lie about that. Not all guys are bad. It’s just that it’s more difficult to find a good guy in this day and age than to just hook up with them or not deal with them at all.

9. I don’t want to be tied down

I love being able to make my own decisions, whenever I want to make them. I am a very free-spirited person, so I don’t want to have to make sure the decisions that I’m making are okay.

If I want to go travel for a week with my friends, I don’t want to have to feel like I have to run it by someone else before I do it. If I meet someone wherever I am, I want to be able to have fun instead of saying no because of a relationship back home.

10. I’m focused on myself

photo via pexels.com

There is nothing wrong with wanting to focus on yourself instead of a guy. It’s not selfish to focus on things you want to do with your life. I have so many plans for myself and my life, so I want to make sure those goals are attained.

Women are often made to feel like we are selfish for doing things that help our lives instead of sharing our lives with someone else. It’s not fair to us to have to choose.

You can post those cute and romantic photos of your boyfriend and yourself, that express your love for each other online. However, unless you and your boyfriend share the social media accounts (which is something no one does), then that also means you have no idea what he is doing, who he is talking to, or what he is looking at.

Thankfully, you trust your partner and know that they won’t cheat or do anything that goes against any unspoken, spoken, or just naturally known but never spoken about rules.

Despite that last statement about trust being something that many girlfriends firmly believe in, (after all trust is crucial in relationships). There are still lots of girlfriends out there who don’t trust their boyfriend or just want to test their loyalty and devotion to them.

This is a big issue and one which is more common than you think. Many girlfriends chose to catfish their boyfriend to test them and see if their boyfriend will stray, and continue to flirtatiously message the attractive and seductive girl they are posing to be.

However, catfishing is something that should not be done. That’s right, no matter how insecure or doubting you are, you cannot catfish your boyfriend.

To those girlfriends who do catfish their boyfriends, or the girlfriends who are contemplating doing this, read on to learn why you shouldn’t catfish your boyfriend.

What is catfishing your boyfriend?

In normal cases of catfishing when you are not dating the person, the definition for a catfish, is a person who pretends to be someone other than who they are.

They use fake names, images, likes, and interests to pursue people online. They gear the fake images, interests, and likes to suit the person they are trying to catfish.

However, in this case, since you and your boyfriend are already dating, the definition of catfishing is a little different. The definition mentioned above is still generally what happens.

However, when girlfriends catfish their boyfriend, they create a different account that is designed in certain ways that they know their boyfriend will be drawn to.

Usually, they use a very sexy picture of another woman and have all of the interests that their boyfriend will be interested in, just to draw him in.

After doing that they then add their boyfriend and start talking with him via social media.

As they continue to message online, the girlfriend, through the fake account, then starts making sexual advances to see how the boyfriend will react.

Typically, what the girlfriend looks for in his responses are to see if he denies being in a relationship, if he lies and says it’s a horrible one, if he lies about the traits of his girlfriend, if he flirts and tries to seduce her, and if he wants to meet up to have sex.

Although testing your boyfriend’s loyalty to you by doing this may seem safe because you know that this woman isn’t real because it is secretly you, it is still a very dangerous game to play. There is so much that can go wrong by doing this, and there is so much wrong about doing this.

Why you shouldn’t catfish your boyfriend

No matter if your boyfriend passes or fails the traps you are setting for him, there will be lots of damage done to your relationship if you catfish your boyfriend.

Obviously, in the end, the main reasons as to why you shouldn’t catfish your boyfriend is trust. However, there are also other reasons aside from that, which do revolve around trust but are also separate entities too.

He is trust worthy, you aren’t

After you have catfished your boyfriend, if he doesn’t find out, it means he was loyal to you. That is obviously awesome. However, what isn’t awesome is the fact that you had to check up on your boyfriend because you don’t trust him.

Now comes a very hard part. Since your boyfriend doesn’t know that you did this, and he was also very loyal to you and your relationship, you now have some guilt.

Think about it this way, you didn’t trust your partner, so you tested him, he passed the test with flying colors, and now he doesn’t know that you had doubts about him.

Meaning, what you did is very hypocritical. You did something that makes you untrustworthy and he doesn’t even know that you had done it to him.

Yet, you thought he was the untrustworthy one so you put him to the test to see if he would cheat, meanwhile you were the one who was sneaking around.

In the end, it is best to come clean and be completely honest with your boyfriend about what you had done. This will definitely cause some issues in your relationship, or it may even break the two of you up.

However, no matter what result you think will happen, you need to own up to what you did, or else it will always be something that will make you feel guilty.

Additionally, you should tell him that you catfished him because complete honesty and communication is required for a healthy, loving, amazing, and long term relationship.

In this case, the reason as to why you shouldn’t catfish your boyfriend is because it will make you the untrustworthy one in the relationship. In turn, this will harm what the two of you share together as he will always doubt if you trust him and if he can trust you.

What else have you been doing?

When looking at this reason for why you shouldn’t catfish your boyfriend, it usually means he once again didn’t fall for the trap you had created.

Instead, in this scenario, he found out what you had done and is now not only doubting you but is also wondering what else you have been lying about.

Additionally, your boyfriend may also be wondering if you are guilty of cheating, and thought that if you were cheating, he might also be cheating.

An important thing to remember here is that you cannot get mad at your boyfriend. Instead, you need to be completely honest about everything and be willing to answer all of his questions with detail, in hopes that you and him will not break up. You will also need to spend lots of time regaining his trust if you two do stay together.

He’s busted

You should never catfish your boyfriend even if he ends up being guilty of cheating and falling for the trap.

Of course, if you caught him cheating, you should end things in your relationship because you deserve better than someone who cheats on you.

However, that still doesn’t mean you should have catfished him as it is something that is also very lacking in the trust department.

Additionally, once a woman has catfished their boyfriend and has found out that he would cheat, they then move on to another boyfriend.

However, some women then have this feeling that their new boyfriend may cheat. Meaning, they decide to catfish their new boyfriend to test if he will.

Because this strategy has not only worked before but is technically a way where they may not get found out, it becomes a go-to method of testing trust for the girlfriend to use.

This then leads to the girlfriend having trust issues, which will lead to a vicious cycle of not trusting their boyfriend. In this cycle, she will fall for the addictive, easy, and tempting to use the test that is catfishing, and then see if she can trust her boyfriend.

The only problem is that she will probably get caught, tell him, or see that he is cheating, and then date someone else and repeat the same cycle.

Catfishing your boyfriend is something that should never be done. You should trust that he would not cheat on you or hurt you in any way. However, if you do feel the need to catfish your boyfriend, then you should realize the warning signs.

It usually means your relationship is not strong, you both don’t communicate enough, or you just do not trust your partner. Regardless of the reason, talk to your boyfriend and try to make things work, instead of sneaking behind his back and testing him.

After all, that will only cause more problems in your relationship as it is not a solution to your issues.

I was sorely disappointed.

This is why I’m urging you to do a striptease for your man.

Let me explain what I saw. When I went to the club, there was a young woman in her early twenties on stage. She was pretty, I wouldn’t say gorgeous or sexy, and she looked bored out of her mind. There was a pole in front of her, but she mostly stood there kind of swaying back and forth like she could think of a million other places she’d rather be.

It was pretty sad to watch.

I wasn’t exactly sure what made strippers so sexy, until it occurred to me: it’s not always the act of watching strippers that’s hot, but it’s the idea of not being able to touch them! In other words, men want the forbidden fruit.

You can easily, and quite simply, become the forbidden fruit your man wants to touch. You don’t have to know how to pole dance, you don’t even need a pole, and you certainly don’t have to have any talent (most strippers don’t, it’s not like they show on TV). Here’s really all you need to do to learn how to strip for your man.

1. Stretch first

Striptease is a form of exercise, and with any form of exercise, you need to stretch before you begin. Bend down and touch your toes (as best you can), raise your arms high in the air, and do a few warm-up stretches to loosen your muscles. You don’t need to do a full thirty minute workout, you just need to relax so you don’t give yourself a Charlie Horse.

source via pinterest.com

2. Wear something sexy, but comfortable

There seems to be this misconception that strippers have to have perfect bodies and wear little bikinis. This just isn’t true. Wear something that makes you feel sexy. If it’s a thong and tank top, do it. If it’s a silk little nightie, do it. You have to feel sexy in order to be sexy.

3. Choose the right music

You’re not going to be able to strip to rap music, no matter how much you might want to. What you really need is to get yourself some hot 80’s rock (think of hair bands) or some pop music with fantastic rhythm and beat. Choosing the right music is the most important aspect of stripping because that’s what makes you feel like giving your guy a sexy dance.

4. Stand in a doorway

You probably don’t have a pole, do you? Don’t worry, almost nobody has a pole. However, you do need to balance yourself somehow, so I recommend stripping in the doorway. That way you can slowly slide down the edge if you want to, and you have something to catch you if you lose your balance. Everyone loses their balance at some point, it’s perfectly normal.

5. Pretend you’re someone else

If you’re feeling self-conscious and having a difficult time building up the nerve to do a striptease, then just pretend that you’re someone else. I have actually put on a black wig and done my make-up heavy in order to get into the role of someone other than myself. If you can’t be you, be someone else. Costumes really help out with that.

6. Move slowly

Don’t rush your dance. A striptease is a slow seduction, not a disco. You’re aiming to entice, seduce, and arouse your lover. Move your body slowly, take small steps, and gently slide slowly up and down the doorframe.

The best way to do this is to pretend you’re making love to an imaginary man. Give the “orgasm” look, caress your inner thighs while you slowly lift up your nightie…lick your lips seductively and look your man straight in the eyes with that “come here” look.

source via linternaute.com

7. It’s all in the hips

If you do nothing else, you HAVE to use your hips! Swaying isn’t really sexy, it’s lazy. You don’t want to go belly dancer hips crazy, but you do want to very slowly move your hips from side to side as you bend your knees and straighten them up again. Hip motion shows your capability to move in bed, and it’s the most enticing way to do a striptease.

It’s absolutely normal, so don’t panic. The good news is you can absolutely bring the life back into your relationship by exploring different sex positions to spice up your marriage.

All you need is two willing individuals who want to have fun and enjoy exploring each other as if it’s the first time. Yes, things may have changed.

Your body may not look the same, things have probably shifted in opposite directions, and you most likely acquired a few extra wrinkles and sun spots with the years.

However, your needs are still there. So don’t dismiss a decline of sexual intimacy as a normal part of any marriage. It doesn’t have to be.

You can spice up your marriage with different sex positions designed to keep both parties entertained and interested after years of being with one person. Try them. They’re fun!

1) The love seat

The name typically refers to you and your partner making use of your very comfy couch. More specifically, the armrest. By leaning over the armrest, making yourself comfortable, your partner can then easily penetrate you from behind, or from the front – depending on how flexible you are.

The soft cushioning will protect whatever needs protection while you get busy spicing up your marriage.

2) The washer

No one said your washing machine should only be used for clothes washing purposes, right? So make use of this device by having your partner sit on the washing machine while you sit on top of him with the spin cycle on.

You’ll experience a whole other meaning to ‘doing the laundry’. Washing clothes has never been this fun and inviting.

3) The stair master

I would suggest only trying this particular sex position to spice up your marriage if you have some cushioning on the stairs. Preferably a carpet. Although, you could get rug burns.

Either way, with your partner sitting on one of the steps and you sitting on his lap facing away from him, you can easily hold onto the railing and maneuver your way around, or up and down. Point is, just have fun!

4) The pretzel

The name suggests it all! Have your partner straddle your left leg between his legs while you’re lying on your left side. Your right leg will be bent at his waist, giving your partner easy access to all of your pleasure spots.

You can be in full control of how slow or fast you want him to go, as far as trying different sex positions to spice up your marriage, this is a winner.

5) The chef master

Who doesn’t enjoy the old sturdy kitchen counter to do everyday things like chopping vegetables, preparing meals, and spicing up your marriage? It’s at a perfect height for your partner to easily slip in and enjoy all you have going on in the kitchen.

So get up onto that kitchen counter, wrap your legs around his waist, make sure you have something warm placed under your bum and have fun. Show him who’s master of the kitchen, or mistress in this case.

6) The Hoover Maneuver

This one may be a little bit more advanced, so be sure to have strong upper body muscles, especially in your arms as you’ll be close to doing a handstand while your partner holds onto your legs.

1. He doesn’t call you

A man who wants to call you will do so. If he leaves you his number, it’s not a good sign that he genuinely wants to pursue you. In fact, it means he’s about to sit back and let you pursue him, which is the exact opposite of how it should be. It’s an age-old debate still valid today. Men enjoy the chase, and you should feel special enough to want to be pursued. So, leave your number and let him do the pursuing.

2. You’re always texting first

Not all men are the same, but generally speaking, a man will bite for as long as you throw the bait. However, a man who’s just not that interested will not text unless you text him first. Chances are, he’s most likely texting another woman instead. This goes back to being pursued. If you find yourself always texting first, take a step back and let him send the first text. It’s a good indication of how he feels about you.

3. He gives you a hug on your date

Some men may want to take things slow, which is a great thing—especially on a first date. However, you can tell by the type of hug he decides to give whether or not that hug is going to turn into something more. Always trust your intuition on this one. Be level-headed, but see it for what it is. If he wants it to turn into more, he’ll arrange a second date, so don’t stress.

4. He doesn’t ask questions

A man who wants to get to know you will ask important questions. He will ask simple yet important questions to see if you’re compatible. Men who are only after a good time will ask a whole different set of questions or none at all. Keep this in mind when meeting a potential partner.

5. Your needs aren’t validated

It’s all about him, and your needs aren’t valid enough to keep in mind. If you’ve ever been in this situation, you’ll know how subtly it can come across. Nonetheless, your needs are just as important as his, and they should be validated. If it’s all about him, it’s a pretty clear indicator that he is just not that into you.

6. He’s always too busy

If a man wants to spend time will you, he will. It may seem as if you should just sit back and let him call you when he wants, and you should jump at the right moment. That’s not at all the case. Nothing should stand in your way of taking initiative, but pay close attention to his reaction when inviting him to spend time with you. Your time is valuable, and he should know that. If he hesitates, don’t even go down that road again.

7. Flirting is one-sided

Some men will keep their opinions to themselves in the hope of saving you the heartache. Those men consider your feelings, however, the feelings you may be feeling will never be reciprocated. If the flirting is only coming from your end, see this as a good indication that he’s not that interested in you.

8. Gifts are non-existent

A man who likes you will give you a flower or two eventually. The gifts don’t need to be expensive at all—a simple garden flower will even do. However, if a man keeps hanging out with you, time after time, but he never shows any type of affection in the form of a gift, see this as his way of telling you that he doesn’t want to give you a gift. Men are really simple to figure out.

9. He talks about another woman

If a man is interested in you, he’ll rarely bring up another woman. If he does, it could mean he’s trying to figure out how you feel about him talking about other women. However, if he continuously brings it up, you should know that he has his eye on someone other than you. Chances are, he only sees you as a friend.

10. You can feel the lack of interest

Finally, you can feel if a man isn’t as interested in you as you’d like him to be. Trust your gut instinct—you were given it for a reason. If you’re unsure, ask him. He’ll either be very open to talking about it or he’ll avoid it altogether in which case he’s already answered your question. Trust what you feel. Love should never be one-sided. Sure, there will be times when one person gives more than the other, and vice versa. It’s all dependent on circumstances, but it’s never a constant off-balance situation. In the case of a man who’s just not that interested in you, he may feel bad to tell you the truth, hoping you’ll eventually catch his drift. However, it’s important to learn the tell-tale signs to avoid brutal honesty, which is a lot more painful than catching a hint. It is also important to learn how to tell if a guy likes you – combining all the signs can help you discover a lot about him! Always believe a man when he tells you the truth—in whichever way he decides to do it. You deserve someone who feels just as strongly about you as you feel about him, and never expect anything less!

As women, we may want to see things that are not there, and some men may not want to hurt our feelings by telling the truth about their intentions. It’s never a win-win situation, and someone always ends up getting hurt. This is why it’s important to believe what he’s trying to tell you instead of believing what you’d like to believe.

Men always tell the truth in their own way. It may be communicated in the form of a gesture, the lack of a phone call, or even the way he speaks about you. Women, in contrast, have a tendency to twist what men try to communicate in a way that benefits us.

It may seem harsh but it’s a fact. You never want to believe that he is just not that into you when you really want him to be. So, you make up excuses to justify his actions when the truth is, he’s just being honest without actually saying the words.

So, in order to save you some heartache and lots of disappointment, have a look at the following signs that he is not into you:

1. He doesn’t call you

A man who wants to call you will do so. If he leaves you his number, it’s not a good sign that he genuinely wants to pursue you. In fact, it means he’s about to sit back and let you pursue him, which is the exact opposite of how it should be. It’s an age-old debate still valid today. Men enjoy the chase, and you should feel special enough to want to be pursued. So, leave your number and let him do the pursuing.

2. You’re always texting first

Not all men are the same, but generally speaking, a man will bite for as long as you throw the bait. However, a man who’s just not that interested will not text unless you text him first. Chances are, he’s most likely texting another woman instead. This goes back to being pursued. If you find yourself always texting first, take a step back and let him send the first text. It’s a good indication of how he feels about you.

3. He gives you a hug on your date

Some men may want to take things slow, which is a great thing—especially on a first date. However, you can tell by the type of hug he decides to give whether or not that hug is going to turn into something more. Always trust your intuition on this one. Be level-headed, but see it for what it is. If he wants it to turn into more, he’ll arrange a second date, so don’t stress.

4. He doesn’t ask questions

A man who wants to get to know you will ask important questions. He will ask simple yet important questions to see if you’re compatible. Men who are only after a good time will ask a whole different set of questions or none at all. Keep this in mind when meeting a potential partner.

5. Your needs aren’t validated

It’s all about him, and your needs aren’t valid enough to keep in mind. If you’ve ever been in this situation, you’ll know how subtly it can come across. Nonetheless, your needs are just as important as his, and they should be validated. If it’s all about him, it’s a pretty clear indicator that he is just not that into you.

6. He’s always too busy

If a man wants to spend time will you, he will. It may seem as if you should just sit back and let him call you when he wants, and you should jump at the right moment. That’s not at all the case. Nothing should stand in your way of taking initiative, but pay close attention to his reaction when inviting him to spend time with you. Your time is valuable, and he should know that. If he hesitates, don’t even go down that road again.

7. Flirting is one-sided

Some men will keep their opinions to themselves in the hope of saving you the heartache. Those men consider your feelings, however, the feelings you may be feeling will never be reciprocated. If the flirting is only coming from your end, see this as a good indication that he’s not that interested in you.

8. Gifts are non-existent

A man who likes you will give you a flower or two eventually. The gifts don’t need to be expensive at all—a simple garden flower will even do. However, if a man keeps hanging out with you, time after time, but he never shows any type of affection in the form of a gift, see this as his way of telling you that he doesn’t want to give you a gift. Men are really simple to figure out.

9. He talks about another woman

If a man is interested in you, he’ll rarely bring up another woman. If he does, it could mean he’s trying to figure out how you feel about him talking about other women. However, if he continuously brings it up, you should know that he has his eye on someone other than you. Chances are, he only sees you as a friend.

10. You can feel the lack of interest

Finally, you can feel if a man isn’t as interested in you as you’d like him to be. Trust your gut instinct—you were given it for a reason. If you’re unsure, ask him. He’ll either be very open to talking about it or he’ll avoid it altogether in which case he’s already answered your question. Trust what you feel.

Love should never be one-sided. Sure, there will be times when one person gives more than the other, and vice versa. It’s all dependent on circumstances, but it’s never a constant off-balance situation. In the case of a man who’s just not that interested in you, he may feel bad to tell you the truth, hoping you’ll eventually catch his drift. However, it’s important to learn the tell-tale signs to avoid brutal honesty, which is a lot more painful than catching a hint. It is also important to learn how to tell if a guy likes you – combining all the signs can help you discover a lot about him!

1. Their Last Name

First of all, why would you want to have sex with someone you know so little about? Getting to know his last name should honestly be within the first few minutes of conversation if you ask me, and should definitely be covered before you get under the covers.

2. Their Phone Number

This isn’t so much so that you can call him in order to make sure you see him again, but more that unfortunate things can happen when you have sex with someone. You could get an STD or fall pregnant, and will need his information to tell him either way. And, of course, if things go well you’ll want to give him a call again.

3. A Glimpse at Their Sexual History

You don’t have to know exactly how many girlfriends he’s had or what his ‘number’ is, but you should know a brief history. This means you should have an idea if he’s been in some serious relationships or if he’s someone that just sleeps around and then leaves. This is important because if he’s had serious relationships, he’s more likely to be respectful and have probably been with less people, which means less of a chance for STDs. If he’s been a bit promiscuous, you may have to be careful that he’ not just using you.

4. If They’re Trustworthy

It’s hard to tell if someone is trustworthy when you’ve just met them, but a good indication of trust is with your gut instinct. Trust it. Humans have an instinct for being able to tell if someone (or something) is dangerous and if they should steer clear.

5. What Their Relationship is Like with Their Mom

If you’re unsure what your gut is telling you then you should ask him about his mother. The fact of the matter is that a man’s relationship with his mother will tell you all you need to know about how they treat the women in their life. If a guy is close to his mom, then he’s more likely to treat you with respect whereas a guy who doesn’t get along with his mom or treats her poorly will not. Find this out and you’ll be able to tell if he’s trustworthy.

6. If They’re Currently Sleeping with Someone Else

He should tell you this fact out of respect. However, if he fails to mention anything, just ask him if he’s currently single. You should always know someone’s relationship status before jumping into bed with them. You don’t want to accidentally end up being the other woman, do you?

7. If They Have Any STDs

Again, this one should be something they’re forthcoming about, but some guys would rather get laid than be respectful to the person they’re having sex with. So, even though it’s not the sexiest thing to ask someone before getting naked, it is necessary and can save you a lot of strife in the end.

8. If Sex is a Big Deal to Them or Not

This really depends on how far along you are in your relationship because if you’re about to have sex with a guy you’ve just met, he probably won’t make a huge deal out of sex. But, you should be aware of what sex would mean to the relationship you currently have with the other person before sleeping with them.

9. Any Debilitating Boundaries They May Have

It may not be a topic that you want to get into right before hopping into his bed, but it’s a discussion that should be had. Just ask him if he have any ‘no-go’ areas or if he’s fully accepting of anything. This is beneficial to know because it’ll save you from making a mistake and ruining a good time. It can also give you the chance to tell him what you’re definitely not into so you can avoid any awkwardness during the act.

10. If You Feel Safe with Them

The most important thing for you during sex is that you feel safe and secure. You should always know how you feel in this regard before allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable around someone. If you have sex with someone who you don’t feel safe with, you could end up feeling bad about the whole thing and even regretting it later. Sleeping with someone is a bigger deal than some people like to make it. If you’re considering getting frisky with someone, make sure you know these 10 important things beforehand. What else do you consider to be important before sleeping with someone?

It’s not only easy to just pick a hottie at the bar, take him home and have your way with him, but also extremely fun! But, maybe you should rethink going about finding someone to hook up with in this manner. While you might get your needs met for that night, you could be forced to deal with unfortunate circumstances if things don’t always go your way.

This isn’t just for guys whom you randomly meet and want to hook up with; it also applies to those you’ve recently started dating. There are consequences to getting into bed with just about anyone.

For that reason, you should be aware of certain things about the other person before giving yourself over to them. Here are the important details you should know about anyone before sleeping with them.

1. Their Last Name

First of all, why would you want to have sex with someone you know so little about? Getting to know his last name should honestly be within the first few minutes of conversation if you ask me, and should definitely be covered before you get under the covers.

2. Their Phone Number

This isn’t so much so that you can call him in order to make sure you see him again, but more that unfortunate things can happen when you have sex with someone. You could get an STD or fall pregnant, and will need his information to tell him either way. And, of course, if things go well you’ll want to give him a call again.

3. A Glimpse at Their Sexual History

You don’t have to know exactly how many girlfriends he’s had or what his ‘number’ is, but you should know a brief history. This means you should have an idea if he’s been in some serious relationships or if he’s someone that just sleeps around and then leaves.

This is important because if he’s had serious relationships, he’s more likely to be respectful and have probably been with less people, which means less of a chance for STDs. If he’s been a bit promiscuous, you may have to be careful that he’ not just using you.

4. If They’re Trustworthy

It’s hard to tell if someone is trustworthy when you’ve just met them, but a good indication of trust is with your gut instinct. Trust it. Humans have an instinct for being able to tell if someone (or something) is dangerous and if they should steer clear.

5. What Their Relationship is Like with Their Mom

If you’re unsure what your gut is telling you then you should ask him about his mother. The fact of the matter is that a man’s relationship with his mother will tell you all you need to know about how they treat the women in their life.

If a guy is close to his mom, then he’s more likely to treat you with respect whereas a guy who doesn’t get along with his mom or treats her poorly will not. Find this out and you’ll be able to tell if he’s trustworthy.

6. If They’re Currently Sleeping with Someone Else

He should tell you this fact out of respect. However, if he fails to mention anything, just ask him if he’s currently single. You should always know someone’s relationship status before jumping into bed with them. You don’t want to accidentally end up being the other woman, do you?

7. If They Have Any STDs

Again, this one should be something they’re forthcoming about, but some guys would rather get laid than be respectful to the person they’re having sex with. So, even though it’s not the sexiest thing to ask someone before getting naked, it is necessary and can save you a lot of strife in the end.

8. If Sex is a Big Deal to Them or Not

This really depends on how far along you are in your relationship because if you’re about to have sex with a guy you’ve just met, he probably won’t make a huge deal out of sex. But, you should be aware of what sex would mean to the relationship you currently have with the other person before sleeping with them.

9. Any Debilitating Boundaries They May Have

It may not be a topic that you want to get into right before hopping into his bed, but it’s a discussion that should be had. Just ask him if he have any ‘no-go’ areas or if he’s fully accepting of anything. This is beneficial to know because it’ll save you from making a mistake and ruining a good time. It can also give you the chance to tell him what you’re definitely not into so you can avoid any awkwardness during the act.

10. If You Feel Safe with Them

The most important thing for you during sex is that you feel safe and secure. You should always know how you feel in this regard before allowing yourself to be completely vulnerable around someone. If you have sex with someone who you don’t feel safe with, you could end up feeling bad about the whole thing and even regretting it later.

Sleeping with someone is a bigger deal than some people like to make it. If you’re considering getting frisky with someone, make sure you know these 10 important things beforehand. What else do you consider to be important before sleeping with someone?

1. I’m not perfect, and that’s okay

It’s strange, I know. Sometimes I do things that have not been right. Right for me or right for a relationship. One of the most important things my relationships have taught me is that it’s okay not to be perfect. Anyone who goes into a relationship expecting that nothing is going to go wrong at some point is out of their dang mind. Perfection doesn’t exist – it’s as simple as that. Intertwine two people who aren’t perfect and something is bound to happen. There are going to be fights, and yes, sometimes they will be your fault. You have to learn how to accept that you are wrong (trust me, I know this is HARD) and apologize for what you’ve done. I have had to come to terms with the fact that I am not going to be perfect. I’m never going to be “perfect” for someone because it’s not possible. We all have our quirks about us that some people may just not like. These quirks may also be the things that our person likes most about us. You don’t have to be perfect for a person to be able to love you. You just have to find a person who is going to appreciate everything about you – the good and the bad.

2. If you’re not ready, don’t be in a relationship

It can be extremely difficult to tell whether or not you are ready for a relationship. Most times people think that they’re ready for a relationship solely because they want to be in a relationship. Being ready for a relationship and really wanting one don’t always correlate. Usually, when you’re ready for a relationship, it happens when you aren’t even looking for one. Even then, sometimes that person may not have come around at a great time for you. Being in a relationship takes more than just being mature enough to handle it, it also means that you’re in a good place in your life and can add on a relationship to it. It’s not fair to the other person for you to get into a relationship with them if you aren’t going to be able to give them the right amount of time and energy. You wouldn’t want someone to do that to you, so you need to understand that you cannot do that to another person. There’s no need to lead a person on if you have any thought in your mind that it isn’t going to work.

3. Sometimes things just don’t work out

Like I said before, just because you have the time, doesn’t mean that you’re ready for a relationship. Even if you are ready for one and things turn out not to be how you thought they were going to, it’s okay. You don’t have to spend the rest of your life with the person you’re with right now. You are under no obligation to anyone to even stay with that person if they don’t make you happy anymore. There’s nothing wrong with ending something that just isn’t working for you anymore. Not every date you go on has to lead to a relationship. Sometimes you think you’ll get along with someone so well, just to spend time with that person and figure out that you have nothing in common and it’s just awkward. It doesn’t say anything bad about you if you end things with someone. You have to focus on what makes you happy. It’s not the end of the world because something ended, that maybe really needed to end.

4. Not everyone is going to hurt you

Most of us have been hurt. I think that many people have that person who we think of every once in a while, and feel something about it. No matter what that person did, you still have fears that someone else is going to do the same thing. It took me a long time to learn that my boyfriend is not trying to hurt me. Having not been in the healthiest relationships in the past, it’s weird for me to be with someone who would do anything for me. To be completely honest with you, I think I’m still even learning that. The way you used to fight with your ex-boyfriend should not be the way you try to talk to the person you’re with now, and vice versa. Not everyone is out there to hurt you. The thing you have to learn how to do is not constantly go after people who are like your exes in the bad ways. You’re going to drive yourself crazy having the same fights with different people. It’s not worth it.

5. We all still have learning to do

One thing that I still struggle to remember is that my boyfriend is not a mind-reader. There is no possible way that he is going to be able to always know when I’m upset and what’s upsetting me. You have to express to your partner what is going on. I’m in no way saying that it should be a hostile conversation. There are ways to express discomfort respectfully, and that’s still something that many couples need to learn. For most people, when they get into a healthy relationship after years of having terrible ones, they don’t know how to handle it. With every new person you start to date, you both are trying to figure out how to incorporate each other into their lives. It’s one of the most difficult things to do at times because you are basically sharing your life with someone now, and that can be scary. When you accept that no one is perfect and that we’re all still learning about ourselves and about the people who we want around us, you start to be happier. Figuring out what you liked and disliked about certain relationships is very important. You shouldn’t stay with someone if you’re not happy, and you shouldn’t feel like you have to end something because it’s going “too well” and think that something will go wrong soon. It isn’t healthy. Relationships, good or bad, will teach you many things about yourself and what you want out of life. It can be scary, but it can also be fantastic when it turns out well. Keep on learning. If you liked this article, then please like and share it! If you have any thoughts, leave them in the comments section below.

We are all fully aware that relationships can be complicated, and that there is no such thing as the “perfect” relationship. Even with this prior knowledge, we still tend to subject ourselves to entering this territory again. We know that we may well likely be hurt once again, but we are willing to do it anyway.

This is because we know more about ourselves and what we want out of relationships with every failed relationship. Let’s be honest. Every relationship that didn’t end in marriage was a failure, as the definition goes. There’s nothing wrong with it. But they teach us some pretty important things.

Here are some of my lessons learned from past relationships.

1. I’m not perfect, and that’s okay

photo via pexels.com

It’s strange, I know. Sometimes I do things that have not been right. Right for me or right for a relationship. One of the most important things my relationships have taught me is that it’s okay not to be perfect.

Anyone who goes into a relationship expecting that nothing is going to go wrong at some point is out of their dang mind. Perfection doesn’t exist – it’s as simple as that. Intertwine two people who aren’t perfect and something is bound to happen. There are going to be fights, and yes, sometimes they will be your fault. You have to learn how to accept that you are wrong (trust me, I know this is HARD) and apologize for what you’ve done.

I have had to come to terms with the fact that I am not going to be perfect. I’m never going to be “perfect” for someone because it’s not possible. We all have our quirks about us that some people may just not like. These quirks may also be the things that our person likes most about us.

You don’t have to be perfect for a person to be able to love you. You just have to find a person who is going to appreciate everything about you – the good and the bad.

2. If you’re not ready, don’t be in a relationship

It can be extremely difficult to tell whether or not you are ready for a relationship. Most times people think that they’re ready for a relationship solely because they want to be in a relationship. Being ready for a relationship and really wanting one don’t always correlate.

Usually, when you’re ready for a relationship, it happens when you aren’t even looking for one. Even then, sometimes that person may not have come around at a great time for you. Being in a relationship takes more than just being mature enough to handle it, it also means that you’re in a good place in your life and can add on a relationship to it.

It’s not fair to the other person for you to get into a relationship with them if you aren’t going to be able to give them the right amount of time and energy. You wouldn’t want someone to do that to you, so you need to understand that you cannot do that to another person. There’s no need to lead a person on if you have any thought in your mind that it isn’t going to work.

3. Sometimes things just don’t work out

photo via pexels.com

Like I said before, just because you have the time, doesn’t mean that you’re ready for a relationship. Even if you are ready for one and things turn out not to be how you thought they were going to, it’s okay.

You don’t have to spend the rest of your life with the person you’re with right now. You are under no obligation to anyone to even stay with that person if they don’t make you happy anymore. There’s nothing wrong with ending something that just isn’t working for you anymore.

Not every date you go on has to lead to a relationship. Sometimes you think you’ll get along with someone so well, just to spend time with that person and figure out that you have nothing in common and it’s just awkward.

It doesn’t say anything bad about you if you end things with someone. You have to focus on what makes you happy. It’s not the end of the world because something ended, that maybe really needed to end.

4. Not everyone is going to hurt you

Most of us have been hurt. I think that many people have that person who we think of every once in a while, and feel something about it. No matter what that person did, you still have fears that someone else is going to do the same thing.

It took me a long time to learn that my boyfriend is not trying to hurt me. Having not been in the healthiest relationships in the past, it’s weird for me to be with someone who would do anything for me. To be completely honest with you, I think I’m still even learning that.

The way you used to fight with your ex-boyfriend should not be the way you try to talk to the person you’re with now, and vice versa. Not everyone is out there to hurt you. The thing you have to learn how to do is not constantly go after people who are like your exes in the bad ways. You’re going to drive yourself crazy having the same fights with different people. It’s not worth it.

5. We all still have learning to do

photo via pexels.com

One thing that I still struggle to remember is that my boyfriend is not a mind-reader. There is no possible way that he is going to be able to always know when I’m upset and what’s upsetting me. You have to express to your partner what is going on. I’m in no way saying that it should be a hostile conversation. There are ways to express discomfort respectfully, and that’s still something that many couples need to learn.

For most people, when they get into a healthy relationship after years of having terrible ones, they don’t know how to handle it. With every new person you start to date, you both are trying to figure out how to incorporate each other into their lives. It’s one of the most difficult things to do at times because you are basically sharing your life with someone now, and that can be scary.

When you accept that no one is perfect and that we’re all still learning about ourselves and about the people who we want around us, you start to be happier. Figuring out what you liked and disliked about certain relationships is very important. You shouldn’t stay with someone if you’re not happy, and you shouldn’t feel like you have to end something because it’s going “too well” and think that something will go wrong soon. It isn’t healthy.

Relationships, good or bad, will teach you many things about yourself and what you want out of life. It can be scary, but it can also be fantastic when it turns out well. Keep on learning.

1) Listen to your gut

You know that listening to your gut is a really important thing in life and that when you don’t listen to your gut, you’re always sorry. You may think your gut instincts can’t tell you anything about a guy when you’re chatting on a dating app. After all, you’re not sitting across from him, right? How can you tell what kind of person he is? The truth is that your gut instincts can tell you a lot if you just take a deep breath and pay attention. You know if you’re getting a creepy vibe from someone. If you want to know how to weed out guys on dating apps, then learn to listen to yourself. Learn to stop talking to someone when you’re not getting the best vibe. It’s much better than going on the date and meeting the guy in person and realizing that you don’t want to be there.

2) Know that you don’t owe anyone anything

You have absolutely no obligation to anyone that you talk to via a dating app. If you’ve been chatting with someone for an hour on Tinder and realize that you have zero interest in meeting them in real life, then you don’t have to. You really don’t. You don’t owe them anything. And you definitely don’t owe them any more of your time and energy, especially if they’re being rude, insulting or just kind of weird. Knowing how to weed out guys on dating apps is really as simple as being more careful about who you go on a date with. You don’t have to go out with everyone. And you probably shouldn’t (especially since then all you would be doing is dating and you do have a life too).

3) Stop texting so much before the first date

When you have a first date scheduled on your calendar, it can be very tempting to text someone for several days up until you actually meet them in person. The problem is that if someone is texting you too much, he might be very clingy if you actually start dating him… or worse (as in he might be crazy). If you’ve both been texting like it’s going out of style, there’s a reason. He might be so desperate for a girlfriend that he already thinks that you are already his or something equally as creepy. Knowing how to weed out guys on dating apps is all about being cautious, so save the texting for making plans (at least in the early stages).

4) Go on fewer dates

Wait, isn’t the whole point of using a dating app so you can go out on dates? Yes, of course. But it’s also like meeting a guy in a bar or through a friend. Sometimes you like them and sometimes you don’t. It’s totally okay to chat with someone for a bit and decide that they’re just not for you. You would definitely rather go on fewer bad dates, right? So make this your new dating motto and stick to it. If you want to know how to weed out guys on dating apps, then go ahead and schedule fewer dates. If you think more carefully about who you actually want to meet, you might be surprised at how much clarity you have.

5) Make a plan ASAP

You don’t want to talk to someone forever and then realize that they had no intention of ever meeting you face-to-face. Maybe this has happened to you before and you’ve learned your lesson. Or maybe it hasn’t yet. But either way, this is a good online dating lesson to learn and remember. It doesn’t matter how sweet and funny and charming this guy is (at least on your iPhone). If he won’t actually meet you in person, then you have to move on and find someone who will. It’s basically a law of online dating: the longer you chat, the less chance there is of an actual date. If he has no interest in making a plan and gives you a bunch of excuses (he’s busy, he’s working, he’s going on vacation), then cut things off.

6) Make the first move

If you really want to know how to weed out guys on dating apps, then making the first move is something that you really, really want to do. Do you want to be a passenger in your dating life, sitting back and waiting for guys to message you? Do you want to miss out on meeting a decent guy because he was too nervous to ask you out and you refused to? If you want to be more in control, then you definitely need to make the first move. This will not only help you figure out what kind of people you actually want to date but will prove which guys just can’t handle a woman taking charge.

7) Be a bit paranoid

While this might sound a bit silly, it’s honestly good advice. You know that there are losers out there who don’t know how to talk to a woman, whether online or in person. Never assume that someone is a good person even though they’re insulting you or asking for a naked photo (ugh). They’re not and they should know better. It’s best to be as careful as you can about who you chat with, let alone meet for a drink.

8) Stick to your values and principles

It’s okay to have a list of qualities that you want in a potential boyfriend. That doesn’t make you super picky or a diva. You’re smart and you know who you want (and who you don’t want). You could have the best online chat with someone about your latest Netflix obsession but if you don’t think he’s cute, he lives an hour away, and his profile says hook-ups only, why would you even bother? Make a list (either on paper or just in your head) of the qualities that you want someone to have and then make sure that you go out with guys that fit that list. Easy, right?

9) Know the difference between being nervous and being scared

You’re going to be a bit nervous about going on a first date. There’s really no way around it. If you never get any first date nerves, then you’re probably not telling the truth. But there’s a difference between normal butterflies and an unsettling feeling that you shouldn’t meet this person. You can absolutely cancel the date if you change your mind or feel unsafe.

10) Remember that what a guy is like in person counts more

You want a guy who is better in person than he is on paper (or on your phone). Unfortunately, sometimes a guy is really fascinating when you’re chatting online. You think he’s funny, smart, and all of the positive qualities that you want in a partner. Naturally, you jump at the chance to meet him in person and start dreaming of all the romantic moments that the two of you are definitely going to have. Not so fast. He might be more boring when you’re sitting across from each other in a bar than when you were chatting back and forth. And that’s really not a good sign. Don’t keep dating someone just because you had a good feeling about them. If he’s not the nicest person or makes you feel bad in any way, shape or form, then make sure there isn’t a second date. Plain and simple. Online dating is not exactly a piece of cake, but that doesn’t mean you can’t find success with this method of dating. If you want to know how to weed out guys on dating apps, then follow these tips and you should be good to go when it comes to finding the right person for you. Now get swiping. Have you found success with online dating? What are your tips and tricks for finding the right guy on dating apps? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

Thanks to dating apps, dating can sometimes feel like a full-time job. And since you actually have a full-time job, that’s not great news.

How are you supposed to figure out who’s worth talking to, let alone actually grabbing a drink with on a Friday night? The truth is that finding a good guy online is a lot easier than you probably think.

It’s time to start enjoying online dating because it’s easy and convenient. Read on to find out how to weed out guys on dating apps so you can find a guy actually worth meeting in real life… and so you can make a real love connection this time.

1) If you’ve had the talk

Oh, “the talk.” This is one of the most important conversations that you will ever have in your relationship… and of course, it’s also one of the most terrifying. There could be a horror movie made about it, that’s how much anxiety it gives you. It doesn’t matter how well you think things are going or how into you this guy seems. You know that with one conversation, your dreams of a real romance could fly out the window and you could find yourself single again. After all, it’s definitely happened to you before. If you’ve had the talk with the new guy in your life and you are official, then that’s awesome. You will know that this is the right time to tell people about the new guy in your life because you’re official now. Why wouldn’t you tell them? When you’re asking yourself that question, well, that’s when you speak up.

2) If you haven’t had the talk, analyze his behavior

Okay, so in some cases, you can tell people about the new guy in your life when you haven’t officially become each other’s boyfriend and girlfriend yet. It’s possible that things are going really well, you just haven’t gotten around to having a serious conversation yet. If you haven’t had the talk, then go ahead and analyze his behavior. You will realize soon enough that he’s either not boyfriend material after all… or that you’re definitely one step away from making things official. If he’s already acting like your boyfriend – keeping in touch all the time, making sure you two are seeing each other on a super regular basis and learning as much as he can about you – then go ahead. You can tell people about him for sure. You don’t have anything to lose at this point since it definitely seems like you’re on the right track to being in a real relationship.

3) If you feel sure about him

Regardless of whether or not you have made things official with the new guy in your life, you definitely don’t want to say anything to your friends or family until you feel sure about him. As long as you can tell that this isn’t a fling or something that is very unstable, then that means that you’re certain that this is going in a positive direction. You have to listen to your gut in this kind of situation because only you know what feels totally right and what feels completely wrong. You’ve dated guys before that you weren’t certain about, so as long as you’re sure now, then go ahead, make those phone calls (or send those text messages).

4) If there are no red flags or warning signals

If you’re wondering when to tell people about the new guy in your life, you definitely have to make sure that there is nothing sketchy or strange going on. Maybe you really like him and are trying to ignore the fact that there are a few things that are setting off warning bells in your head. It can be really tough to realize that a new guy is not right for you after all. But it doesn’t matter how cute he is or how much you want him to be your boyfriend. If you’ve got some major lifestyle differences or he just doesn’t want to commit, there’s nothing that you can do to change that. It’s probably not the best idea to tell your BFF that you are dating an amazing guy if there are a few red flags that you just can’t ignore.

5) If this isn’t a rebound

Wondering if your new relationship is built to last? If you have any inkling that it might be a rebound, then you definitely don’t want to tell your friends, parents, and siblings about it. Think about it. While you might not care what they think and while you might want to do whatever you want anyway, do you really want the people that you care about to lecture you on how you’re moving on way too fast? Probably not. On the other hand, it’s totally fine to tell people about the new guy in your life as soon as you’re sure that things are going well if you’ve been single for a while. Your friends and family will be thrilled to hear that you’re in a new relationship and that you’re so happy about it.

6) If you feel completely ready

You’re the only person who really knows when something is right in your life, and that goes for relationships, work, and anything else. If you feel completely ready to spill about the new guy that is bringing you so much happiness, then what’s stopping you? It’s definitely time to speak up if that’s what feels good for you.

7) If not telling them is getting awkward

Are you ready to bring your new boyfriend to your friends’ birthday parties? To your family holidays? To your work events? To any events at all? When not telling your friends and family feels super awkward, that’s when you definitely need to speak up. You want to be able to bring him places without having to awkwardly introduce him because you haven’t told anyone about him before.

8) If you’re not an overly dramatic person

When you’re wondering when to tell people about the new guy in your life, sometimes you have to sit back and think about the kind of person that you are. If you are super dramatic and always acting like the new guy that you just started seeing is your one and only, your best friends might roll their eyes when you say that’s happened again. They might not believe that your new relationship is good for you and they might even change the subject. That’s not exactly the way that you want this to go. Not a very dramatic person? Then go ahead and tell everyone that you are thrilled to announce your new relationship. They will know that you’re for real because you don’t think that every guy you come into contact with is your soulmate.

9) If he is truly part of your life now

There’s a difference between starting to date someone… and inviting someone into your life. When you reach the point where you’re sharing your life with another person, that’s a great milestone. When your life starts to change because of this new guy and he is definitely part of your world, there’s no reason to keep quiet. Your friends need to know about the massive change that has just taken place, and you can bet that your parents and other relatives will be wanting to know what’s going on as well. It’s only fair, it’s only right, and it only makes sense that you let them know what’s up. Figuring out when to tell the people in your world about a guy that you are excited about is always tricky. On the one hand, you want to be honest as soon as you can because you don’t want to hold anything back from the people that you love. On the other hand, you want to be certain that you have a relationship to even speak of. But if you follow these tips, you will always know what to do, and soon you’ll be celebrating your new love story with your friends and family. When do you tell people about a new guy? Do you wait a long time or tell them right away? Share your thoughts with us in the comments below!

So you finally met the love of your life… or at least a great new guy who seems like he could play that role. You’ve got it all: physical attraction, fun conversation, some things in common, and mutual respect.

1. Focus on your man’s strong points

Get out a pen and write down all the things you love about him. It will remind you why you fell in love with him in the first place. Then, when you slip in these compliments, he will feel good about himself. Blasting him with genuine positivity is a surefire way to clear negative energy that can come up from the stress of day-to-day life. Think about what he is always working on and focused on, and compliment him for that. We all have strong points and we feel better about ourselves when people notice them. Make this a regular habit, and you’ll notice it will help him feel more confident and enjoy your company. Don’t nag and point out what you don’t like about him, or he will come up with reasons not to hang out with you.

2. Plan a dream travel trip

Sometimes we get stuck in a routine, and we forget to add things that are fun and exciting. Send him a picture of an exotic destination, and see if it perks his interest. TheFlightDeal.com is a great website to find discounted rates a month or two in advance if you sign up for their newsletter. Figure out how much you both want to save each month and make a savings account for fun travel. This can give you something to look forward to, and you’ll see it brings in a fresh energy of adventure and playfulness.

3. Plan a special home-cooked meal

They say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, and that old adage still holds true. If you want to show your love for him, make something new and delicious. Make it a surprise with candles, and go the whole nine yards by setting the table nicely and dividing the meal into courses. Plan a special dessert like fondue or chocolate pie. Nothing says I love you like chocolate. If you’re not confident cooking, just follow a recipe and you can’t go wrong. Pasta dishes are fairly easy and even a gourmet homemade pizza can be fun. Remember to think about the flavors he really loves and asks for. This is all about making him happy, not yourself. Is there something he is a sucker for such as scallops, gnocchi or homemade pad thai? Food elicits happy feelings and can be very effective in helping him relax and unwind.

4. Write your man a love letter

Before computers and cell phones, handwritten letters were a great expression of the heart. In fact, now that it is so rare, taking the time to write a carefully thought out letter can really catch him off guard and warm his heart. Romance isn’t complicated; it’s simple, right? We just forget to show affection sometimes, and a good old-fashioned love letter with a spritz of your perfume can really get him smiling and thinking about how much he loves you. If you want to really make the letter potent, you could write a poem or find a good one to include with the letter. Add a photo of the two of you in with the letter, and leave it where he won’t expect to find it. If you have writer’s block, you can write the lyrics to a love song, especially if it’s your song. That’s right, ladies: cheesy, sappy love songs can still get your man feeling like he’s in high school. Don’t discount the power of the written word!

5. Frame a beautiful, romantic photo of the two of you

They say a picture is worth a thousand words, so why not get a cool picture of the two of you framed or printed onto a canvas? You could go one step further and get a photographer or a friend with a high definition camera to do an artistic photo shoot of the two of you to highlight your unique bond. Look through old photos, and if you really want to have fun with it, get a tri-fold frame or a collage frame. You don’t have to spend a fortune on this either. CVS, Walmart and Walgreens do canvas wrapped enlargements for around $10. Maybe this could go with your man to work and be a reminder of how close you are. Guys can be sentimental just like us. Stop feeling bitter about what he’s not doing or noticing, and use your own ability to shift the mood by being creative and kind. Relationships are mirrors of our own perspectives and behaviors more than we often realize, so keep it fun and keep it positive. You have your work cut out for you, ladies. We want to hear how this works. Remember, when we stop thinking about ourselves and start showing love and affection, it builds the positive energy between us and our men.

If you would like to improve the connection between you and your man, little things can go a long way. Making an effort to bring in romance can really help to spark the flame again, and luckily you don’t have to go reinventing the wheel. Here are tried and true ways to ignite your heart and build that bond that cannot be defined in words.

Your man likes to know how special he is to you and that you love him. Don’t be the tough guy; be sweet and tell him how much you love him all the time. He will also start to feel more comfortable saying nice things back to you. Here are other simple things you can do that will create a romantic vibe between the two of you and instantly improve your relationship.