Tell me. Has this ever happened to you? You wake up in the middle of the night, roll over, check your phone and see this:
No Caller ID? That must be your ex, right? You are filled with excitement. You believe they want you back. You are ecstatic. You have hope. YOU ARE LOVING LIFE.
Your inner voice starts to say, “What do they want? Why did they call? I knew they would call.”
You go to work/school thrilled that morning. You start asking your friends what the meaning could be behind all of this?
“Why did she call me? If that means A, then B must be true! She’s probably trying to make me jealous because of XYZ.”
Then you decide to text them (like an idiot).
You: Hey did you call me?
Your ex: No
You: I noticed a missed call are you sure it wasn’t you?
Your ex: Oh looks like I accidentally butt dialed you
You. Oh ok. How are you?
Your ex: (crickets chirping)
You misread the entire story as these were accidental breadcrumbs. Now you are coming off way too strong again and she’s gone. Permanently.
Don’t be that guy. I don’t know if you know this, but it’s impossible to read minds, so anyone that gives you a definitive meaning to a signal is just telling you lies. They’re dumb. Run away.
Now, I’m not saying you should ignore all the signs. Be wary of them, just don’t accept them 100%. Also, she can easily tell you things that have a completely different meaning.
You see, relying on signals puts you in a position of weakness because instead of focusing on you, you are focusing on them and being reactive. This is a big mistake. When you put your faith on things that are not certain you are gambling with the outcome. So yea, sure, you could read some of them right, but some you could get way off.
Having said all of that, here are the top 5 signals:
1) Reminiscing
2) Emotional
3) Territorial
4) They are finding reasons to meet up
5) Schedule is open
Let’s break these down 1 by 1:
Reminiscing
Are there reminding you of a moment in your past? This means they are digging into the memory bank. This is happening for a reason that was triggered by emotion.
Emotional
Did they flat out tell you something sweet or that they miss/love you. Again, it’s emotion there. Self-explanatory.
Territorial
Are they asking about something they saw on social media. A post. A like. Under no circumstance should you feel like you have to explain yourself, but do take a mental note that they just asked you this.
They are finding reasons to meet up
Do you have their things and they want them back? Did she forget something in your car? This isn’t always a strong signal, but it can be.
Schedule is open
Are they available suddenly? Do they make time for you? If you are questioning this then it’s probably a good sign. When you hang out with them, is it an all day affair devoid from any time restrictions? This is a good sign.
Now, here’s what I want you to do.
If you take 1 lesson from this article, it’s this: Take the signs, but don’t over analyze.
Start to focus on yourself. The more you do, the less entangled you will be with these signals. You will feel better, look better and think clearer. It’s a win-win situation.
Paradoxically, the best way to get to the next level and improve is by keeping yourself busy, not to look into these signals (even though I did myself so I get where you are coming from).
You will experience confusion. It’s almost impossible to avoid.
Don’t ask every person you know what they think about each signal. This is pointless, dumb and frankly how in the world would they know? This is going to throw you off your game plan and disrupt your confidence.
Furthermore, talking about your ex to everyone is not something you want to do anyways. The more you ask the more powerful they become in your mind.
Payam Pakmanesh, is the author of getyourexback.co. He’s fanatical about self-improvement and growing as a person. Sign up for his newsletter and receive a free copy of his e-book “Get Your Ex Back: 5 Texts You Should Never, Ever Send,” about how to respark that attraction and what you shouldn’t do before you lose your ex forever.
